Two Faces of Human Nature

Two Faces of Human Nature

Human beings love freedom.

They want to make their own decisions.  

When someone interferes, controls them, or imposes rules, an inner resistance rises.  

This begins in childhood itself.

If you tell a child, “Don’t do that,” the child wants to do exactly that because control hurts the child’s inner sense of freedom.

But the same human being also carries a desire to control others.

In the family, at work, among friends, everywhere, people want their opinions to dominate, their words to be heard, and their preferences to be followed.  

This is another side of human nature: the pleasure of authority.

In a family, the father, mother, and children all want their own freedom.  

At the same time, each wants to guide or direct the others.  

Parents control children in the name of “love,” but the child experiences it as control.

Even between partners, the attitude of “my opinion is right” becomes the root of many conflicts.

No family can function without this tension.  

Yet the same tension also creates many problems.

When freedom and control are not balanced, relationships become strained.

The workplace is the stage where the human desire for authority becomes most visible.  

Managers want to control their subordinates.  

Subordinates dislike being controlled.  

But if they get a chance to control someone below them, they enjoy it.

This is the cycle of human nature.

With authority, a person feels like a “ruler.”  

Without authority, the same person feels like a “slave.”

These conflicting feelings create stress, competition, jealousy, and confusion at work.

In society, everyone wants to live life on their own terms.  

But social rules, laws, traditions, and values all control human behaviour.  

Without them, society cannot function.  

But if they become excessive, people lose their freedom.

At the same time, everyone wants to comment on others’ lives.  

Saying “He shouldn’t do that,” “She shouldn’t behave like that” gives people a hidden sense of authority.  

This is the mindset we see everywhere on social media.

The reason humans dislike being controlled is fear,

Fear of losing freedom  

Fear of losing self-worth  

Fear of making wrong decisions  

And the reason humans want to control others is the opposite form of the same fear,

Authority gives a sense of safety  

Others will respect them  

Life will feel under their control  

Both are two sides of the same coin.

What is true freedom?

True freedom is not “No one should control me.”  

It is “I should not feel the need to control others.”

When we respect others’ freedom, our own freedom is respected.  

Authority is not about suppressing others.

In the family: listening to others’ wishes and opinions strengthens relationships.  

At work: authority is responsibility, not a tool for control.  

In society: everyone has the right to live their own life.  

In personal life: freedom is not the absence of rules; it is living with awareness.

Humans do not like being governed by others.  

But they like governing others.  

This contradiction is a fundamental truth of human nature.

Only those who understand this truth attain real freedom.  

When we let go of the desire to control others, life becomes simpler and more peaceful.  

When we respect everyone’s right to live their own life, human relationships become more civilised and humane.

With love,  

Sakthi Sakthithasan